A Great Way to Connect with Your Kids

In today's day and age it can be very easy to lose our connection with our kids.  And it starts to happen at a younger and younger age.  I have thought about this a lot, as do many parents.  I have a 7 year old (8 in less than a week!).  And the thought that we may someday be separated by silence scares me.

So, with that thought and prayer I set out to come up with a way to keep us connected in some small way.  Something that would strengthen the bond we already have and I think it is a fun one at that.  Can you see me smiling?!

Journaling!  Now, to some this may originally sound boring.  Some people do not like to journal.  But hear me out.  This is not just any journal it is something that will be fun for both you and your kids.  It will also give your kids a way to say the things they would never say out loud!

First I set out to make something special.  I could go buy a new journal and so could you.  You can make it a date and pick something out the really speaks to the heart of your child.  My daughter is super crafty and creative.  UNLIKE ME!  I am not.  So I decided that I would create her journal even though it would be a challenge for me, because I knew it would mean a lot to her.

First I took just a small notebook I had and since I didn't want that white paper on the front that looks so boring I decided to add a cardboard front too it using rubber cement.  I forgot how stinky that stuff was!

After bonding the cover over the original I decided to draw on it what it was to be used for.  It was a journal for us so I put our names on it.  She helped me decide where the flowers and hearts went and decided when we were done drawing.  

Before I had put the front on and before she knew what I was up to I wrote a note inside the journal.  The note started out, "My dearest Charis! I love you so much..." and went on to explain what this journal was for and why I was doing it and then finally how to use it (we will get to that in a moment).

I can't explain to you the excitement in my daughters eyes when she read the words on those pages.  You could see that she was feeling really loved and cherished.  She was feeling like she was super important and that she was going to be heard and really listened to.  Now she is only 7 (soon to be 8) but being heard and understood is still important to her. 

My heart soared with excitement knowing that she was going to be sharing with me and I with her all the things that are important too us.  We were on our way to strengthening our bond we already have, making it unbreakable.

As for the practical use of the journal here is how you use it.  You give it to your child and after you read to them, do their devotionals, cuddle or talk... you know, all those bedtime things we do together?!!  When those are done and you have kissed them good night it is their time to write.  See, a lot has happened in their little day and this helps them get it off their chest.  They can write about what happened with friends, what happened with you, the family or the dog.  They can also write about what has upset them, made them happy or things that confuse them.  They can ask questions about God, boys, friends, or your family relationships.  

Most importantly when there is something that is too difficult to say out loud, they can write it here and not fear what will happen.  It gives them a sense of release and the sense of an open door.  They know they will be listened too.  Now when they go to sleep they put it on their side table, dresser or book shelf and go off to slumber land.  The next morning it is up to you to go get it, take it to a private place and read it.  

The most important thing you will need to remember I believe was something the Holy Spirit really wanted me to convey is to never act shocked, shaken, angry or freaked out over what you read!!!  I repeat, remain calm no matter what!  Or you have lost them.  This must always be and remain a safe place remember?!

Once you are done reading what they have written you then write back to them, answering all their questions, giving them advice kindly, and most of all telling them how much you love them no matter what they let you know.  

I have told my daughter that I might come talk to her about some things once in a while, but that it will always be out of love.  And if it doesn't sound like I am being loving she has my permission to tell me so.

Her heart was so filled with excitement.  She is ready to communicate and to connect.  This will be a lot of fluff for a while I am sure.  She is only 7 (soon to be 8) you know.   But as she gets older, and this tradition continues... How much more valuable will this be?

I would love to see your ideas on this... and pictures of yours.  Share your blog links and pictures and how things are working out for you.  Most of all... be blessed!

Where Do You See Joy?

God has been helping me see so many new things in so many new ways lately.  He has been prepping me, growing me and guiding me to those things that He would have me do.  One thing though that He always does, even when that growing and changing happens, He always shows me where the joy is.  

I find it in many things, in many ways.  One though that is constant is through the love of my daughter.  She is incredible and an amazing gift from God.  I am truly blessed to call her my girl.  I love you Muppin!

The Road Less Traveled By

"Do you realize what you are doing?  You are going to ruin your child.  She is going to grow up without any real view of what the world is like!  She is going to be awkward and isolated because of what you are doing.  She is going to have difficulty fitting in, being happy, being loved, loving others. She is going to grow up not knowing what all the other kids know.  She is going to grow up not experiencing what all the other kids experience.  How cruel.  I can't believe you are going to subject her to that.  My heart breaks for her."

Those comments I have heard more than once, by more than one person.  Most don't bombard me with those things all at once but they do come.  I am a Christian.  I am also a Christian who has decided to homeschool.  And to some one those things is bad enough but to add the other means I must be some radical racist who must be hiding in my bunker just waiting for the end of the world.  I guess there is some tiny bit of truth mixed in that comment.

I am a Christian and I am radical... for the things of Christ, for my family, for people.  Christ loves us with such a radical love that he went all the way to the cross.  So I love Him regardless of the backlash I receive, even if it is from the very family I love so much.  I love my daughter so much that after she suffered abuse at the hands of another student (you know, that thing called bullying) repeatedly and suffered physical injury, and I watched her get terrible migraines at school whiles suffering emotional injury, and I watched her learning creep to a stop because of mental injury I could do nothing but remove her from that situation.

I didn't make this decision lightly, I did as much research as I ever have for anything I have ever done.  And if you know anything about me, then you know I tend to research something more than I probably need to. As I did my research all those comments listed above grew smaller and smaller and all the positive things that I found grew more an more.  See I didn't look into homeschooling because I was a Christian, though many Christians do homeschool.  I looked into it because I loved my daughter more than I love myself and though the thought of homeschooling terrified me and what that meant for the next who knows how many years I wanted what was best for her.

I saw the statistics and how most homeschoolers are much more well rounded relationally because they learn to talk to all walks of life and ages in everyday life.  They are not stuck in a classroom with a bunch of kids who are only their age.  They know how to deal with younger, same age and older people.  They have no fear of another age population which is sometimes rapid among kids.  I saw that their stress levels were much lower but their test scores were so much higher.  Their suicide levels, teen pregnancy levels,  drug abuse levels, as well as other risky behaviors were all much lower, because their families were a tighter unit, not because they didn't have the opportunity.

Since becoming a homeschooler I have seen that most are much more active in the community, in fun activities, in exciting opportunities most kids can't get because they are so busy with school and homework it leaves little time for anything else.  Most excitedly I see that they are free to explore their passions, become what they hope, dream and desire to be without being forced into a direction they would never desire to go.  

Just as Robert Frost did when he was homeschooled, he decided to follow the road less traveled and became an incredible poet, one of the countries most beloved.  And it was his homeschooling family, particularly his mother, Isabelle that inspired him to be a poet because of the rich literature they read on a daily basis in their homeschool environment.

I will continue to follow the road less traveled because I love my God and my family.  I am happy to hear those comments from others who don't understand and will always show them through actions that what they fear for my child, is what they will someday marvel at because they just did not understand the fruit that would come from the road less traveled.

 

(The above was written for Free Write Friday using what is called stream of consciousness writing, no editing, no proofing just write!,  [ Writing prompt ~ Talk about a time you took the road less traveled and the differences it made…] Please check out Kellie Elmore's blog  for more information on Free Write Friday's, twitter hashtag #FWF and join the fun!  Just write!)

My First, My Last, My All

First, I was going to make this a 3 part series but I just couldn't do it.  I didn't want to hold off on any parts in fear you may not come back and finish, leaving you with only part of the truth.  So forgive me but this is long.  :)  My God pressed upon me to share and so share I have done.  Grab your coffee or water and let yourself see what the Lord has for you today.

Our pastor, Pastor Jon Cobler, spent about 3 weeks talking about that thing that most people hate to hear about the most in church, money and tithing.  Most of us when we hear a preacher on TV or in the pulpit tend to tune out when it comes to hearing about “our money” and what we are supposed to do with it, in particular, tithing.

I must admit that there were times in my early years of marriage that I didn't want to hear those sermons either.  They were always labeled with "supposed to" statements and comments riddled with guilt. As if I didn’t already feel guilty enough!  We may not remember the exact words used but we sure remember how they made us feel.  And that impression can surely sower a person to the concept of tithing very quickly. 

I have always wanted to know how the tithe is truly to be looked at since there is a difference between the Old Testament Covenant & Law and New Testament Covenant & Grace.  I am not happy to just be spoon fed and I love to dig deeper and find the truth in the midst of all the laws put upon us by modern day Pharisees.  So this study was perfect.  Of course a lot of what I will be sharing with you is revelation shared by my pastor, but it wasn’t shared by me until I spent the last couple weeks going over every verse he gave us as well as reading much more on the subject that I came to the conclusions I am sharing with you now.  And the conclusion I have come to is that I am to give Him my First, my Last and my All.  Let me explain.

I have been a faithful tither for many years but what does it really mean?  Is my idea of faithful the same as the Lord’s?  Are my reasons for tithing the right reasons?  God clearly tells to us to give with a cheerful heart. 2 Corinthians 9:7 says, “Each one must do just as he has purposed in his heart, not grudgingly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.”  Then there are these questions… Do you tithe before taxes, after?  Do you tithe on money you make on tax returns, interest earned?  You know… these are all the questions that will help you to justify keeping more of "YOUR" money and give God less.  How silly considering that all we have is only given to us because it was HIS to give to us in the first place.  We wouldn’t have it if it weren’t for His grace, mercy and love.  He is surely the true Cheerful Giver.

So for me it was wonderful that Pastor Jon really went deep into Old & New Testament and showed us a more meaningful and Godly way to look at tithing.  Let’s look at some things I learned and I pray that it will touch you the way it touched me.  First we will look at the Old Testament then the New Testament. 

OLD TESTAMENT (Testament means Covenant)

Definition of the Biblical word Covenant: 

• The conditional promises made to humanity by God, as revealed in Scripture.
• The agreement between God and the ancient Israelites, in which God promised to protect them if they kept his law and were faithful to Him.

In the Old Testament according to the promises made by God to man, men were to give their first-fruits and at the end of a harvest give 1/10th (or a tithe) of the full amount that they made.   

First-Fruits ~   At the time most people were either farmers or shepherds or a mix of both.  For farmers it meant the first crop that was harvested went directly to the Lord.  For shepherds it meant that the first born was given as a tithe. 

The Tithe ~  For the tithe, at the end of a harvest for the farmer they would gather all they harvested and give 1/10th of that harvest over to the Lord.  For the Shepherd it was the same, whatever they owned at the end of the year they gave 1/10th of their livestock.

The Tithe was put in place to protect God's people from their own greed.  By worshiping the Lord with our tithes then we are keeping God central, instead of our things.  Think about it, how many of us put our things first?  Would we give up our stuff for HIM?  Would you give up your big screen TV to feed children that are homeless?  God may not be asking you to, but if He was, would you?  Or do you worship those things more than you worship God?

The tithe was also to pay for the ministry of the priests and Levites (Numbers 18:21).  They continually did the work of the Lord and therefore could not work outside of the ministry of the Lord to make money.  This helped them do what the Lord asked as well as sustained them.  It was also used for celebrations through specific feasts (Deuteronomy 16:16-1717). 

Another use was to provide a resource for those who didn't belong to the church, as well as for widows and for orphans (Deuteronomy 26:12).  It was to be used this way so that the world would see how generous the Lord’s people were and know there was something different about them and come to know our Lord.  It was to help provide for those who couldn't provide for themselves, the lost, the broken, the hurting.  That is the true heart of God.  

So, do most of us tithe like that today? Do we give to the poor, widowed, and orphaned?  Do we care more about showing the world who God is through our love for His creation, or do we horde our belongings as if we acquired them all on our own?  As if we could!!  All we have belongs to HIM!  Shouldn't we at least give Him true praise by offering back to Him some of what He has already given us?  Just imagine… would there be one hungry person if every true believer tithed the way the Lord asked?  I think not.

I think many are good at giving the tithe (1/10^th) at the end of our paycheck.  But what about honoring Him with our first?  And as far as the tithe goes, do we really honor him with a full tithe, or are we always looking for ways to hold back even there?  I know my worries sometimes push me to think about how much better it would be with that extra 10%.  However the real truth smacks me right between my eyes before I can get too far with that thought.  I know that without a doubt we should not be able to make ends meet right now.  Things keep breaking down and we keep trying to figure out how to pay for things.  But we do!!! That is because our God is taking care of our needs when we honor Him with what is rightfully His.  

NEW TESTAMENT (Testament/Covenant)

In the New Testament Jesus made things easy, the definition of the quantity of our tithe is...

EVERYTHING!

In Romans 12:1-2 Paul writes to tell them/us to "present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship."  In the New Testament we are to start with everything we are.  To me that means all our money and things, as well as our time, and deeds.  Giving of our money is difficult but we recognize that as tithe.  Sometimes giving of our time can be just as difficult.  Again we are selfish, we need our “me” time and heaven forbid if we don’t get it.  When that person at the grocery store starts a conversation with you are you loving them back by conversing with them, or hurrying away so you can do that next thing on YOUR To Do list instead of thinking maybe that person was on God's To do list?  And deeds, will you clean your neighbor’s house when they have that surgery?  Will you fix the washer when your mother-in-law is too poor to call someone else to do it?  Will you spend that extra time with your child when they are craving you, or will you once again tell them you are busy?

Jesus made it clear that in order to be a believer of Him, we needed to confess our sins, turn from them and to follow Him.  If that is the case, following Him needs to mirror His life.  Jesus gave away more than He ever received.  He cared for everyone, the disciples, the followers, the unwanted, the poor, the widowed, the orphaned, the tax collector, the prostitutes and even the Pharisees...  What one of those categories do you fall under?   It doesn’t matter, God Loves YOU!  And as a follower of Christ, so should I!

I believe I am a disciple of Christ, therefore my accountability is much higher than most.  And what I may have not known before this sermon is now before me and I will be held accountable for what I choose to do or not to do in light of this new information.  I don't want to stand before my Father and have him say, "Why didn’t you give my love to everyone you met?"  I believe my sins are absolutely covered by the blood of Jesus, but I must first confess, then I must repent.  And that means I must do my very best to do things the way they should be done according to His Word, not my wishes. And not because my works get me anywhere, but because I love Him and want to live for Him the way He wants me to.  

Love is in the midst of it all.  1 Corinthians 13:1-3  goes on to say that if you do all these wonderful things in this world, but have not love than it is for nothing, and profits me nothing.  Can we truly say we are tithing because we LOVE?

So where do you fall today?  Do you tithe?  How much and why?  Is it out of obligation or out of worship?  If it is the first, I task you to sit and think and pray with the Lord to change that.  Take your money before you tithe in your hands; tell the Lord how grateful you are for the opportunity to give back to Him.  Thank Him for all He has done for you.  Then offer up your tithe, your time, your hands and feet.  Show him that you love Him by listening to Him and finding out how He wants you to be used today.  Make your whole life a living sacrifice to Him who died for you, for He is so faithful to you regardless of your obedience.  

I have been doing this and sometimes I have cried, pouted and gotten angry.  But it was only because of what I found in my own heart…  Selfishness, fear and pride.  After many hours of prayer I am honored to say that I choose in love to give Him, my glorious Father… my First, my Last and my All.

Homeschool Mother's Journal 13

IN MY LIFE THIS WEEK...

This week was kind of a blurr I would say.  We are finishing up a few little things for school and trying to enjoy the couple of 60-70 degree days that we have had.  This Spring has been so cool and wet that when we have a sunny day we just can't seem to believe it!  We love it and wish it would last a bit longer.

IN MY HOMESCHOOL THIS WEEK...

This week we went to the WHO (Washington Homeschool Organization) Convention and enjoyed looking at so many different teaching tools!  However, if you don't go with a plan it is sure to be overwhelming.  That is what happened to us last year (my 1st year homeschooling) and I wasn't sure I ever wanted to go back!  But this year I kind of knew what I wanted and was glad that I had prepared because it went much better than expected.

I came home with the Language Arts and Math curriculum that I had expected too plus a Bible study curriculum I wasn't planning on at all!  I am doing a lot of Notebooking next year so I wasn't looking for curriculum for Bible, History or even Science.  My plan is to get a lot of library books, read, learn, and write about what we learned, draw about what we learned and who knows what else.  But just have fun doing it without textbooks!

So when we came upon this Bible curriculum I was amazed to say the least.  It is called "The Picture Smart Bible" (TPSB) and it is so much fun!  TPSB is a see, hear and do program that uses all parts of the brain, creating a learning experience that is much more deeply seeded and memorable.  It would take me way to long to explain so I hope that you go to their website here and read up on it.  It is truly amazing and I am hoping to do a write up on them in a completely different blog post where I can be more complete in my explanation. I am so excited to do this with my daughter, but as well as for myself!  Our whole family is doing it together!  You can see a picture of the Book of Daniel that you create together to tell the whole story of that book in the Bible.

Great videos about the Picture Smart Bible~  Click here!

I AM GRATEFUL FOR...

My life group women at church.  Life group is the same as home group for some churches I suppose except we do not have a specific Bible study we do.  We get together each week and just read the word of God together and talk about what we received from it.  It is also a place where we can be ourselves, receive wisdom, friendship and love that Christ tells us to show towards each other.  The ladies in my group are just amazing and I am thankful for each one of them.

I AM PRAYING FOR...

For our debt to be paid and an increase in funds so that we can do all that is on our hearts to do for the Lord!

Oh!  And Happy Summer!!!!!!!!!!!!!.

An Incredible Photographer!

Wow!  Life has been busy!  I have not had the chance to sit and write in far too long and I am glad to be back at it.  What I find funny is that the last blog post I wrote about was how to use tools to help you keep on track when blogging!  Goes to show that even with the best tools possible, if you are super busy, life takes over.  

Well, as I get back into things I really wanted to share with you a wonderful photographer with great talent that I recently had the pleasure to work with.  Well, work with is not really true, she worked and I watched ;)  

Recently she called and asked if she could use my Muppin in a photo shoot she wanted to do.  Now, I have always thought that in no way would I ever let my Muppin do modeling of any kind, never!  Modeling can be a slippery slope with lots of dangerous ledges for some people.  Well, once again I realize you should never say never!  I guess I didn't even think twice about saying yes because of the person doing the shoot! She is an amazing woman that I have had the honor to get to know over the last few years and I have no doubt about how she would treat my daughter. 

The photographer is Heather who owns Elements Photography!  To say the least she is incredible!  In few years I have known her I have seen her artistry just blossom and turn into something truly beautiful.  Heather is a a natural light portrait photographer and all her sessions are done on location, however, she is working toward a natural light studio and I can't wait to see that when it is done.

Heather's primary focus is children and high school seniors, though she does photograph newborns, families, maternity and boutique.  I have seen examples of all her styles and love her artistry within each area.  Her love of color is truly captured and there is a vibrant essence of mood and soul and she easily captures a true reflection of the individuals spirit and character.  Her motto is "Life in Focus" and I truly believe she captures that.

Recently Heather was featured in Dreamer - A Creative Sketchbook which is a collaboration between Shannon Sewell and Julie Martin (owner of Zozo Bug Baby clothing).  This is the feature that my daughter was blessed to be part of.  I am both proud of the kids and Heather for putting together such amazing work and sharing that talent with the rest of us.  If you follow the link at the beginning of this paragraph you can look through Dreamer and find Heather's work about halfway through.  Her work is titled "Ice Cream Social" and is on page 41-46 and the shoot turned out really amazing!  You can tell through the pictures she is truly great with kids.

If you live in the South Puget Sound area in WA State I highly recommend Heather with Elements Photography!  Follow her link to her website here and enjoy her works of art.  Her fees are also listed there and are very good prices.  Thanks Heather for your amazing talent!

Photos by
Heather @ Elements Photography

https://www.facebook.com/elementsphotography

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